NEW
(San Diego, CA) - The injury bug has struck former Chicago Cubs pitcher Mark Prior, and this time, it may just end his career. Prior began feeling shoulder discomfort earlier in the week, but after an examination by doctors on Sunday, everyone knew it was serious.
HIPAA laws prevent any of Prior’s doctors from going into detail about his injury, but San Diego Padres’ Chairman John Moores shared with reporters what he understood Prior’s injury to entail. Read more »
Cubs
(Minneapolis, MN / Cincinnati, OH) - Last night, something incredibly exciting was happening in the baseball world. The Nation turned its eyes to watch something special - something it loved to see happen.
The Chicago Cubs shutout the Cincinnati Reds 3-0. Read more »
Baseball
(San Diego, CA) - The injury bug has struck former Chicago Cubs pitcher Mark Prior, and this time, it may just end his career. Prior began feeling shoulder discomfort earlier in the week, but after an examination by doctors on Sunday, everyone knew it was serious.
HIPAA laws prevent any of Prior’s doctors from going into detail about his injury, but San Diego Padres’ Chairman John Moores shared with reporters what he understood Prior’s injury to entail. Read more »
Football
(Bristol, CT) - Well the NFL draft has come and gone, and it brings excitement to football fans all across the country. But it brings joy to none more than ESPN analyst, Mel Kiper, Jr. Now that the draft, post-draft coverage, and post-post-draft coverage have concluded, what is Kiper to do until the draft next year? Report on the NFL offseason? College football spring practice, perhaps?
No. ESPN is placing Kiper in a medically-induced coma “for his own good,” ESPN says. Read more »
Basketball
(Boston, MA) - The NBA playoffs are in full swing, and the big matchup that everyone wants to see is finally taking place. The Cleveland Cavaliers versus the Boston Celtics. Lebron James versus the Celtic Three - Kevin Garnett, Paul Pierce, and Ray Allen.
But is it really fair? Read more »
Other
“Some people question just how productive Sidney will be when he’s 85,” Chairman Mario Lemieux said Friday. “Oh, and additionally, how productive he’ll be when he died 12 lifetimes ago. But we think we’re doing the right thing for this franchise. Sidney is pretty good at hockey.”
;)
Baseball News
Running Low on Options, Mark Prior’s Doctors Recommend Emergency Episiotomy
(San Diego, CA) - The injury bug has struck former Chicago Cubs pitcher Mark Prior, and this time, it may just end his career. Prior began feeling shoulder discomfort... Read more »
White Sox Pitcher Almost Throws No-Hitter - Nation Still Watches Cubs
(Minneapolis, MN / Cincinnati, OH) - Last night, something incredibly exciting was happening in the baseball world. The Nation turned its eyes to watch something... Read more »
Utterly Ridiculous Reed Johnson Catch at the Wall
Chicago Cubs News
White Sox Pitcher Almost Throws No-Hitter - Nation Still Watches Cubs
(Minneapolis, MN / Cincinnati, OH) - Last night, something incredibly exciting was happening in the baseball world. The Nation turned its eyes to watch something... Read more »
Ryan Theriot Euthanized After Failed Stolen Base Attempt
(St. Louis, MO) - Chicago Cubs Nation suffered a tragic loss yesterday when, following a failed stolen base attempt, shortstop Ryan Theriot had to be euthanized.... Read more »
Lou Piniella Turns to Situational Lefty in the First Inning
(St. Louis, MO) - Shortly after losing an extra inning heartbreaker to the St. Louis Cardinals, Chicago Cubs manager Lou Piniella was peppered with questions about... Read more »
Football News
Mel Kiper Placed in Induced Coma Until ESPN’s 2009 Draft Coverage Begins in August, 2008
(Bristol, CT) - Well the NFL draft has come and gone, and it brings excitement to football fans all across the country. But it brings joy to none more than ESPN... Read more »
Charlie Weis’ Body Rejecting Gastric Bypass Surgery
(South Bend, IN) - Fresh off a historically disappointing season for his Notre Dame Fighting Irish, coach Charlie Weis finds himself in the middle of another struggle:... Read more »
Basketball News
3 versus 1 Celtics/Cavs Series Just Seems Unfair
(Boston, MA) - The NBA playoffs are in full swing, and the big matchup that everyone wants to see is finally taking place. The Cleveland Cavaliers versus the Boston... Read more »
Uncomfortable Silence Follows Kobe Bryant Comment that “We Just Raped in Colorado”
(Denver, CO) - The NBA Playoffs are in full swing, and it didn’t take long for Kobe Bryant and the Los Angeles Lakers to dispatch the Denver Nuggets in the... Read more »
Other Sports News
NEWSBRIEF: Pittsburgh Penguins Respond to Washington Senators Signing Alexander Ovechkin to 13-year, $134 Million Extension by Signing Sidney Crosby to 16 Consecutive Lifetime Contracts
“Some people question just how productive Sidney will be when he’s 85,” Chairman Mario Lemieux said Friday. “Oh, and additionally, how productive... Read more »
Tennis Vixen Anna Kournikova Loses Another Tournament; You Would Still Bang Her
(Orlando, FL) - Beautiful tennis player Anna Kournikova, better known for her looks than her tennis playing, recently lost another tournament. Kournikova was participating... Read more »
Flashback Headlines
- NEWSBRIEF: Pittsburgh Penguins Respond to Washington Senators Signing Alexander Ovechkin to 13-year, $134 Million Extension by Signing Sidney Crosby to 16 Consecutive Lifetime Contracts
- Rich Hill Nearly No-Hits Brewers - Julio Lugo Successfully No-Hits Wife
- MLB Plagued by Rash of Teams That Don’t Realize They Suck
- Sean Gallagher Patiently Explains that ‘Hannah Montana’ is the Superstar Performer, Miley Cyrus is “Just the regular girl”
- Cesar Izturis Tests Positive for Performance-Decreasing Drugs
- Pujols to LaRussa: “You can’t come to my birthday party!”
- OPINION: Prince Fielder’s Mom is a Slut
- Prince Fielder Becomes a Vegetarian - Meat Industry Files for Bankruptcy
- Blanka tired of younger brother, Prince, getting all the attention
- Adam Dunn: “Singles are for Douchebags”
