Lou Piniella on First Ejection of the Season: “I didn’t even kill the bitch”

June 30, 2008

Lou Piniella Angry Cubs

(Chicago, IL) – Chicago Cubs Manager Lou Piniella, long-known for his fiery temper and on-field antics resulting in ejections, had managed to stay in every game this year. But that changed on Sunday in the Cubs’ 5-1 loss to the cross-town rival White Sox. The loss was the Cubs’ fourth in a row.

Sweet Lou was ejected after briefly coming out to argue a check swing in the third inning. But Lou wants everyone to know that the ejection was completely unwarranted – he didn’t get his money’s worth. Read more

The 5-Minute Superfan: June 29, 2008

June 29, 2008

Welcome to the fifth installment of The 5-Minute Superfan. If you’re wondering what the heck it is, check this page out. It’s been a crummy week in Cubs Nation. And not the delicious kind of crums – like the kind that fall off of an Otis Spunkmeyer cookie. As an aside, we’ve got a new resource here at The Brickyard: a complete catalog of the Cubs 2008 Draft.  Ok, on with the Superfan. Read more

Chicago Bulls Decide to Go Very Young in NBA Draft – Take Freshman Derrick Rose in First, Zygote in Second

June 27, 2008

Derrick Rose Bulls Draft

(New York, NY) – The 2008 NBA Draft went off last night without a hitch, and many teams dramatically improved their overall situation with draft-day deals. But the storyline dominating the draft was the emergence of young stars as the players every team was targeting. A record 12 freshman were drafted, and it was the first time ever that freshman went 1-2-3 in the draft – though freshman Greg Oden and Kevin Durant went 1-2 last year.

The first freshman selected was Memphis point guard, Derrick Rose, who went to the Bulls with the first overall selection. Clearly interested in “going young” in the draft, the Bulls then set their sites on an even younger target: a zygote. Read more

Orioles’ Brian Roberts to Cubs: “Do you still like me? Circle one: yes/no”

June 26, 2008

Orioles Brian Roberts

(Chicago, IL) – As the Chicago Cubs compete with the Baltimore Orioles at Wrigley Field this week, it seems that one of the Orioles is competing for something else: the Cubs’ affection. Second baseman Brian Roberts, reportedly a target of the Cubs’ interest in the offseason this year, is apparently still interested in the Cubs.

And he’s doing his best to catch the Cubs’ eye. On, and off the field. Read more

Jim Hendry refuses to bring CC Sabathia to Chicago

June 24, 2008

Indians Sabathia(Chicago, IL) – Jim Hendry was asked whether he was prepared to part with several prized prospects in order to bring ace CC Sabathia to the Northside. His answer was absolute and sudden.

“No,” responded the Cubs’ GM, much to the surprise and chagrin of the Cubs faithful, as a bit of glaze drizzled down his chins.

Read more

Cubs Sweep Little Brother White Sox, Fart on Their Head

June 23, 2008

Ozzie Guillen Cubs Fart on Head

(Chicago, IL) – The Windy City Series between the Chicago Cubs and the Chicago White Sox ended in an easy sweep for the Cubs, with a 7-1 victory at Wrigley Field. It was as if the White Sox were the Cubs’ annoying little brother, whom the Cubs flicked away like a fly.

In fact it was exactly like a big brother beating up on his little brother: after the game, the Cubs unceremoniously, and collectively, farted on the White Sox head. Read more

The 5-Minute Superfan: June 22, 2008

June 22, 2008

Welcome to the fourth installment of The 5-Minute Superfan. If you’re wondering what the heck it is, check this page out. It’s been a streaky week in Cubs Nation. And not all the good kind. Think half Heidi Klum streaking, and half Will Ferrell. Read more

Lou Piniella Reminisces on Days When He Used to Manage a Team in Tampa Bay

June 20, 2008

Lou Piniella Devil Rays

(Tampa Bay, FL) – Chicago Cubs manager Lou Piniella sits comfortably in a rocking chair on the porch of his Tampa Bay home. His Cubs were just swept by the Tampa Bay Rays, but Lou can’t be bothered with all that noise. Not now. He’s rocking. And reminiscing.

He wants you to know that he used to manage a team in Tampa Bay, too. Read more

3-Day Waiting Period Saves Lives as Despondent Cubs Fans Await Word on Carlos Zambrano’s Shoulder Injury

June 19, 2008

sad cubs fan

(Chicago, IL) – Cub fan Tim Smithey is had a crummy day yesterday. The Chicago Cubs lost for the second day in a row, surprisingly-good Jim Edmonds left the game with a foot injury, and ace Carlos Zambrano let the game with as-of-yet undisclosed “shoulder discomfort.”

And then, worst of all, Tim couldn’t even buy a gun to blow his brains out. Read more

Boston Celtics Win NBA Title – NBA Declares Playoffs Aren’t Over

June 18, 2008

NBA David Stern

(Boston, MA) – The Boston Celtics and their dynamic trio of Paul Pierce, Kevin Garnett, and Ray Allen had the NBA’s best record this season. It showed in the postseason, as they marched through the playoffs, concluding with a 4-2 series win over the Los Angeles Lakers in the NBA Finals – complete with a 131-92 thrashing in game 6.

Many thought it was a fitting end to the NBA playoffs. But league commissioner David Stern announced shortly after the championship was clinched that the playoffs would go on. Read more

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