Brewers Players, Coaches, Management Can’t Help but Feel at Least Partially Responsible for Collapse

September 17, 2008

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(Milwaukee, WI) – It’s been a brutal stretch for the Milwaukee Brewers. Just a few weeks ago, the team was right on the heels of the Chicago Cubs for the National League Central division lead, and had a comfortable lead of its own in the National League Wild Card race. But after last night’s loss to the Cubs – something that’s happened regularly this year – Milwaukee has fallen nine games back of the Cubs and a half game back of the New York Mets for the Wild Card.

Two days ago, in the midst of this possibly historic collapse, the Brewers unceremoniously dumped manager Ned Yost, making him the scapegoat for the team’s struggles. But can Yost fairly take all of the blame? His former team tends to think mostly yes.

“Look, we’d be inhuman if we didn’t feel a little bit of sympathy for Ned,” Brewers General Manager Doug Melvin said Tuesday. “Are our current struggles one hundred percent his fault? Of course not. It is probably only like ninety-five, ninety-eight or so percent. If I’d have made better acquisitions, maybe that would have helped. But, I mean, CC Sabathia. Come on. I did that. How awesome was that? Yeah. I see your boner.”

Brewers players took a similar tone following the firing.

“I know that Ned is mostly to blame for us falling apart,” Brewers left fielder Ryan Braun said, “but at the same time, I can’t help but feel like us players are at least partially responsible for our losses over the past few weeks. Afterall, we’re the ones at the plate, on the mound, and in the field. Right?”

“I’m not smart enough to fully put the pieces together, but I’m sure there’s some kind of connection between crummy play and losing games. So, yeah, I feel like the players are at least a small part of the equation.”

“Maybe if it hit a few more home runs, or made fewer errors,” first baseman Prince Fielder said. “Maybe we could have done something to stop the losses. I don’t really see how, but maybe.”

The rest of the Brewer coaches also feel partially responsible for the losing skid.

“As a third base coach, I was terrible,” newly-named interim manager Dale Sveum offered. “So I may have been a part of the problem. Though not as gigantic of a problem as Ned Yost, who’s a loser, by the way, but a small part. As a manager, though, I will be magically awesome and force the players to play better.”

When reached for comment, Yost said he has no hard feelings.

“[Expletive] those [expletive]s in their [expletive] [expletive]s. Twice.”

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