Yankees Using 27th Championship to Prop Up Garage Door
November 14, 2009
(New York, NY) – The New York Yankees are the toast of town once again. For the 27th time in their storied history, the Yankees are World Series champions. And the team seemed very excited about it when they left the field last week to celebrate.
But now that the glow of winning has passed, the Yankees seem decidedly less enthused about having another championship trophy.
“Look, I don’t want to come off a bitter type,” the Chicago Cubs said after a visit to the home of their long-time friend, the Yankees in the Bronx. “The Yankees and me, we’re friends. So it’s not that. It’s just that, I mean. I think sometimes the Yankees don’t quite get how fortunate they are to have 27 World Series trophies.”
The Cubs went on to explain that, as the team pulled up into the Yankees’ driveway, he couldn’t help but notice a glimmering trophy sticking out from under the Yankees’ garage door. It was this year’s World Series trophy, and it was propping up a damaged garage door.
“It was really ridiculous,” the Cubs said. “I mean, I would die to have just another one of those, and there it is, just sitting under the Yankees’ freaking garage door. It isn’t right.”
For his part, the Yankees doesn’t really see the big deal.
“Am I glad I have another one? Sure,” the Yankees said. “It’s gold. Or gold-plated or something. So I mean, I’m sure it’s worth something. But I live in a two bedroom townhouse, ok? What the hell am I supposed to do with 27 of those things?”
“I use one as a tie rack. I had another one converted into a biday. Now when I say I wipe my ass with World Series trophies, it’s kind of true. Don’t actually do it, though. Made that mistake one. I was picking little gold flags out of there for weeks.”