MLB Cancels World Series After Yankees, Phillies Fail to Qualify

October 24, 2010

(New York, NY) – The Major League Baseball season is over, so says an official statement from Commissioner Bud Selig’s office.

Most sports fans know that the 2010 World Series has yet to be played after the Texas Rangers defeated the New York Yankees in the American League Championship Series, and the San Francisco Giants dispatched the Philadelphia Phillies in the National League Championship Series. Shouldn’t, therefore, the Rangers and Giants now meet up in the World Series?

There’s no point, says MLB.

“As everyone knows, the Rangers and Giants do not have any fans,” MLB’s statement read. “We simply can’t risk having a World Series game where no one shows up. The black eye that it would cause could have ramifications for years.”

“Fans of Major League Baseball live in three cities: New York, Boston, and Philadelphia. There is a small pocket of fans in urban Los Angeles, but with little disposable income, we’ve been reluctant to explore that market.”

“With those considerations in mind,” the statement concluded, “the World Series is deemed superfluous, and the 2010 season will end in a tie between the Yankees and Phillies.”

When asked about the tens of thousands of fans in the Ballpark at Arlington who were cheering elatedly as the Rangers closed out the Yankees this week, MLB offered the simple explanation: “All Yankee fans, and they simply assumed that the Yankees had won.”


2 Responses to “MLB Cancels World Series After Yankees, Phillies Fail to Qualify”

  1. Nati on October 25th, 2010 7:56 am

    Crack dealers are fans of the Rangers….two of their biggest former clients are on that team.

  2. Ace on October 26th, 2010 9:34 pm

    Ha. Classic.

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