No One Has Heart to Tell Kerry Wood That the Cubs Aren’t the Same This Time Around
December 18, 2010
(Chicago, IL) – Chicago Cubs fans were treated to a wonderful holiday surprise yesterday, when the Cubs announced that they had signed former favorite son, Kerry Wood.
It was a treat to Wood, too, who was excited to come back to the team that drafted him, and for whom he has pitched most of his career. Wood was so excited, in fact, that he accepted millions less from the Cubs.
But it turns out that Wood may have been excited for all the wrong reasons. Read more
Teammates Taking Advantage of Anger Management Graduate Carlos Zambrano
October 8, 2010
(Chicago, IL) – The 2010 season was, by all accounts, a disappointment for the Chicago Cubs. But at least one Cub feels like he’s now set up for a better 2011 because of the trying season. Carlos Zambrano finished the season on a tear following his reinstatement after a mid-season blowup at teammates.
Zambrano credits his second-half success to extensive therapy sessions designed to drill down to the root of Zambrano’s hostile temperament and inappropriately aggressive reactions. The therapy worked famously, but rumors are leaking from the Cubs’ clubhouse that it may have worked a little too well. Read more
Cubs Players Finding It Increasingly Difficult to Interpret Mike Quade’s Eyebrowless Expressions
September 21, 2010
(Chicago, IL) – The Chicago Cubs welcome the San Francisco Giants to town tonight for a three-game series, and although the Cubs have been eliminated from playoff contention, the team’s spirits are up. Under former third base coach, and current interim manager, Mike Quade, the team is an impressive 17-7. The team hopes the momentum continues, and carries forward into 2011.
But it’s not all sunshine and roses on the North Side. Though the players have developed a newfound respect and appreciation for Quade, rumblings are surfacing that there is at least one problem with the manager. Er, well, at least two problems. Read more
Cubs Owner Spotted Filming ‘Undercover Boss’
September 10, 2010
(Chicago, IL) – Just because the Chicago Cubs are terrible at baseball this year doesn’t mean there isn’t entertainment to be had around the Friendly Confines. That’s because the owner of the Cubs, Tom Ricketts, was recently spotted filming an episode of ‘Undercover Boss.’
The popular CBS show, which follows high level executives who go ”undercover” in their own companies as entry-level workers, spent a week filming Ricketts doing various jobs around Wrigley Field. But considering the premise of the show, shouldn’t Ricketts have gone unrecognized?
It seems Ricketts took the “undercover” description a bit too literally in some ways, and completely disregarded it in others. Read more
Lou Piniella’s Sudden Retirement Surprises Many Who Thought He’d Retired Months Ago
August 24, 2010
(Chicago, IL) – The Chicago Cubs and their fans were in for a shock this weekend when Lou Piniella, the team’s manager since October of 2006 announced that he was retiring at the end of Sunday’s game against the Atlanta Braves.
It marked the end of a storied career in baseball for Piniella, 66, who’d previously announced that this season would be his last.
His sudden decision sent shock waves throughout Cubdom, particularly among fans – most of whom thought Lou Piniella had retired several months ago. Read more
Cubs Management Working Hard to District Players from Team Woes
August 9, 2010
(San Francisco, CA) – It’s no secret that the Chicago Cubs are down in the dumps.
The team has lost 10 of 11, manager Lou Piniella is away to tend to his mother, and the players couldn’t be in worse spirits. It’s all they can do to get out of bed in the morning, let alone string together a victory or two.
At long last, however, the Cubs’ front office has taken note of the players’ despair, and they’re working hard to pull the players out of it. Read more
As Trade Deadline Nears, Jim Hendry’s Snack Pack Remains Untouchable
July 22, 2010
(Chicago, IL) – July 31 is a magical date in Major League Baseball. It marks the date by which players can be traded without being subjected to waivers, and possibly claimed by other teams before the trade goes through.
The Chicago Cubs, suffering through a profoundly disappointing 2010 season, are certainly in trade discussions – as they often are this time of year – but they are looking to trade away, not acquire.
That makes general manager Jim Hendry a very busy man these days, as he entertains requests from other teams. But for now, he says his favorite trade piece is off the table. No, his Snack Pack isn’t going anywhere. Read more
Tom Ricketts’ Attempts to Return Cubs Yield Embarrassment, Store Credit
July 13, 2010
(Chicago, IL) – It’s been a miserable first half for the 2010 Chicago Cubs. There have been player-driven headaches, early-season bullpen woes, and a consistent lack of timely hitting. All told, it’s netted a 39-50 club that seems to be going nowhere.
The season has been particularly difficult for new Chicago Cubs owner, Tom Ricketts. When he bought the team this winter for nearly $1 billion, he didn’t expect it to have so many holes.
And now, he’s trying to get his money back. Read more
After Completing Anger Management, Carlos Zambrano Will Head to Shopaholics Anonymous
July 2, 2010
(Chicago, IL) – Carlos Zambrano’s anger finally got the best of him. After a visible outburst last week directed at teammates, Zambrano was suspended by the team, and ordered to attend anger management counseling.
The team hopes the counseling will allow Zambrano to finally reign in his regular angry explosions, but without causing him to lose the fire that allows him to pitch so well.
But Zambrano won’t be back until after the All Star break, even if he completes anger management by then. Why? While the official line is that he needs time away from the team, sources suggest that the reason is because Zambrano will need additional counseling. Apparently, he’s not just addicted to rage. He’s also addicted to shopping. Read more
Mystery Teammate Smashes Starlin Castro’s Vuvuzela
June 19, 2010
(Chicago, IL) – The Chicago Cubs’ clubhouse is in turmoil this weekend, having been rocked by hostility and violence.
According to an anonymous Cubs player, teammates had grown so frustrated with young shortstop phenom Starlin Castro this past week that he was repeatedly receiving tongue lashings and verbal abuse. The abuse quickly turned physical – against the very thing that was enraging Castro’s teammates.
His vuvuzela. Read more
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